As you may or may not know, I’m in Florida, cat sitting for my aunt. Along with the list of cat to-do’s, there was also a plant watering task I have to do every day. My aunt just planted about $500 worth of ivy or something like it in her front yard. It has to be watered for like four hours a day while it is rooting and growing. So every morning, I go outside, turn on the sprinkler and either go back to bed or get my day started and then I water them again at night. I woke up a little later than usual this morning because I got in a little later than usual last night, so I ran outside, closing the door behind me because rule #1 on the cat list is DO NOT LET THE CATS OUT! And I locked myself out of the house….barefoot, in my pajamas, without a phone and/or the key. So I walked around the house about 15 times as if something was going to change. Doors were locked. Windows were locked (and also had screens). Balcony has no steps. And I knew that door was open. So I looked and debated on whether I could scale the column and get on the balcony. And then I remembered that I don’t have an athletic bone in my body. So I went to the neighbor’s house to ask if I could use his phone. Still not sure what good it would do. I tried to call my mom and, of course, today of all days, she didn’t answer for me even though I tried to call 3 times back to back like she does me. I just wanted my uncle’s number because he lives close and I thought maybe he would have a spare key. So the neighbor (sexy, scruffy, surfer looking German neighbor) asks if the balcony door is open. I say, “yes, it is.” He says, “I have a ladder.” So he brings out this 20 foot ladder and I have to climb up to the balcony while he is holding it as my legs shake because I’m terrified of heights and I’m quietly talking to myself, “don’t look down, you got this, bet you won’t lock the damn doorknob ever again, stupid.” I hiked my leg over the railing, the whole time thinking, if this door is locked, I’m going to be stuck up here because I AM NOT climbing back down. Luckily, the door was open and I got in and thanked the gorgeous hero with the super sexy accent and went on about my day. All that before seven am… I was ready for a nap. And to top it all off, I found out later in the day where the spare key is kept and it was, in fact, where it was supposed to be. I guess you live and you learn.