Remedial Flossing 

I am a huge fan of dental hygiene, but I am, by far, the worlds worst flosser. Seriously, I take my oral hygiene very seriously (and I like to repeat words). I brush twice a day. Sometimes three times. I floss almost daily. I don’t even know if you are actually supposed to floss daily, but I feel like that’s the golden dental rule. However,  if anyone ever actually watched me floss, I’m sure they would liken it to a virgin with a corsage on prom night. In the least elegant manner possible, I attempt to wrap the floss around my fingers the way the dental hygienist showed me throughout basically my entire existence. That’s the easy part. It’s the transferring of used floss from one finger to the other finger on the other hand. I’m sure there’s some method to the madness, but it’s like math to me and I can’t seem to figure it out. Not to mention, I don’t have any idea what to do with my tongue when I’m flossing. I basically look like a stroke victim when I floss. My mouth is open, my tongue is contorted, and I’m pretty much drooling excessively (like waterfall excessive). It’s not a pretty sight. That’s why I do it when I shower. Well, when I shower alone, because of course I would never floss with company in there with me. I think they should offer a course in flossing with tact. Maybe there’s a YouTube video or something. I think I’ll search for it. Until then, I’ll (Oral)B Seein ya!!!

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