May Not Be a Complete Success, but I’ll Take a Partial Today

Today was another mostly uneventful day on the Joe front, though I did get a little more information today and definitely got reprimanded by a chaplain, I still don’t know much more than I knew when I went to bed last  night or the night before or the night before. What I do know: when you are in a situation that leaves you in a desperate state of mind and the only thing you can think to do is call any and everyone who has anything to do with resolving said situation, do that. That is basically how I spent my day off today, on the couch, on the phone. And I called pretty much everyone except for the governor and the only reason I didn’t call him was because I got a call back from the chaplain who was pretty frustrated with me for continuing to make calls after he said he was looking into things. In my defense, he also told me that at the end of the week before last and didn’t bother calling me back at all. I even gave him the benefit of the doubt and only left messages on three out of the five days I called him, but still nothing. I will give him credit for answering my phone call today, but I believe that only happened because I called once and didn’t leave a message so I called back to leave one and that’s when he answered, but he was short with me. I know they are frustrated with me. I am frustrated too so I can sympathize, but if any of them took one moment to remember that he is someone’s son, someone’s brother, someone’s love, and put themselves in the same exact position, I don’t believe it would be acceptable by any means to not get one bit of information for fourteen days. And I’m not just selfishly talking about myself. They haven’t told anyone in his family anything nor called them. I understand the “policy” of not being able to tell me anything, and I’ve been really pleasant about respecting the rules in that way, but I was told by three different people that if I couldn’t get a special visit before the 14 day waiting period was over then I would get to visit in 14 days. So when that didn’t happen and it didn’t look like it was going to happen, I let my fingers do the walking. I called all the previous people I had spoken with except for the “doctor” assigned to his case who pretty much told me to go fuck myself the last time I spoke with her. I didn’t bother calling that number back, but all the others I called. I called the social worker, I called visitation, I called medical, I called the chaplain, in that order, when I didn’t get an answer, I called the warden and left a message. I didn’t get a call back. So I called the commissioner. His secretary seemed like she was trying to help and took all my information so she could forward it to the prison so they could call me back. However, everyone there already has all my information. I would say it’s a safe bet that they know my voice by now, the strong one and the weeping one. So I tried the social worker one more time since he was the one who originally promised the visit. He finally answered and acted like he had no idea what was going on and told me I would have to talk to the warden’s secretary. Then he gave me her number. She was very nice as well and took all my information and forwarded it to fourteen people including the chaplain who called me back to scold me for making moves on my own and not waiting for him. I will admit, he has been the most helpful. Well, he had been the most helpful until last week when I was dismissed by everyone including him. So when he called and was visibly upset with me because he had just received a not so nice email, I felt a small pang of something for him, but not enough to back down. He reminded me how he has been trying to help me and trying to do his job, which I didn’t argue. He had been trying to help me, but what he needed to realize is that I, too, have just been doing my job as an advocate for someone who cannot advocate for himself right now. The funny thing about love that the people running the system don’t seem to realize is that when you love someone with the heat of a thousand forest fires, nothing will stop you from loving them and fighting for them, ever. And so with no apologies, I waited for the call I’ve been waiting a week for. And when it finally came, it was from the not so nice “doctor” who I spoke with two weeks ago today. This time, however, she was much more “helpful” or trying to be. I still didn’t get a visit because he had a “procedure” today that made him “not up for a visit,” but when I asked if that meant that he was conscious, she didn’t know, because she’s not his actual doctor, she’s more like his caseworker with a PhD. behind her name. So now I have to wait 48 more hours while they come up with some other excuse to not let me see him, because I’m not quite sure how an unconscious man could not be up for a visit, but I have no other choice but to take their word for it and hope that it means he’s awake though I’m not getting my hopes up just yet, but my faith is at an all time high right now so I guess that can only help, right?

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